“You look much more unwell than last time I saw you. Just by looking at you I can tell you have lost weight, you look weaker. I know you’ve tried hard, and that trying is not wasted.
But you mustn’t give up now. You could be waiting weeks for a bed, and your body cannot afford to keep loosing weight for weeks. The place you are headed is very dark. You are critically unwell. I am trying to avoid you being admitted to a medical ward, because that is the worst place to be. They do not understand eating disorders at all.
You need to keep fighting. You are going to be admitted to an eating disorders unit no matter what. This is rock bottom. You need to do everything you can at home, as though your admission has already begun.
We are doing everything we can to find you a bed. We are phoning round, starting with the closest units, but please accept whatever you are offered. There is no guarantee that a bed closer to home will come up soon.
Once you are admitted to the unit, you must be active in your recovery. It is so easy to give up when you are admitted. To become passive, and let everything be done for you. You will meet people who have been admitted five, six, seven times. They are stuck in an endless cycle because they have become reliant on the intensive support, and cannot cope without it. You need to be pro-active. If you are not then when you are discharged you will be right back where you started.
Use this admission to learn the skills that you can use at home for the rest of your life.
I want this to be your first and only admission.”
Me too Dr Nolan, me too.